Add a pinch of fear

About a week ago, someone stood in line for a private schools’ paging system and gave a little girl’s full name to the guard so the child will come out of the gate. The child came out of the gate, took a look at her supposed fetcher and turned tail and ran back to the guard. She didn’t know the woman trying to fetch her. The woman tried to talk her into coming with her but the child insisted she didn’t know her and refused. The guard stepped in and told the little girl to go back into the school. Shortly after, the woman left through jeepney and sometime later, the little girl’s real fetcher arrived.

When I heard the story from a first hand witness to what occurred, I got scared for my own kids. It’s every parent’s worst nightmare to have their child kidnapped or disappear or hurt in any way. I knew I had to talk to them.

I had already talked to them previously when the Bella Ruby incident occurred here in Cebu but it’s a lesson worth repeating. I sat them both down and told them that not all adults are good and to be safe just don’t go with or accept food from anyone they don’t know, regardless of what they say.

Inasmuch as we want to protect our children from the bad things in this world and keep them innocent for as long as possible, they should also be aware of how and when they need to protect themselves. What this little girl did, to refuse to go with the woman despite an adult’s cajoling, probably saved her life.

My brother — again — mentioned that fear helps keep you aware and is brought about by a need to protect yourself from danger (perceived or real).

The problem is this:

Too much fear will make the child afraid of everything and anything and keep them from experiencing life. Children who are taught to fear too much end up paralyzed and unable to interact with other people. They will become unwilling to try anything new or talk to anyone. That’s no way to live.

On the other hand:

Too little fear will make them reckless and exposed to danger.

It’s up to us parents to strike a balance between the two and it’s easier said than done.

I have no idea if what I’m doing is the right thing or not by cautioning them about the evils in the world.

All I know is I can’t stand the thought of someone having the opportunity to snatch my kids because they trust everyone. I just can’t live with that.